Growing up, as I did, in the 1970s, 80s and 90s one couldn’t help but notice a rather lovely poster of a tennis girl touching her own bottom in the late evening light. It is, of course, mainly the light that made this poster so incredibly popular. There was a horrible rumour spread by troublemakers in the 90s which suggested that the woman was in fact a man. The suspicions were aroused by the fact that she had a faint down on her arms and legs which, exaggerated by the low golden sun, gave her entire body a ‘ready brek’ halo. The rumours were recently scotched when the photographer died and the model emerged from obscurity (which is just outside Birmingham) to claim her place in the anus annals of history.
When The Lady asked me to come up with an image to celebrate 125 years of women’s tennis I didn’t hesitate to suggest a backdated and properly dressed re-working of the self- bottom toucher. If this version sells even half as well as the original I will soon become a Hath (see previous musing) and be able to retire from the vulgar world of work and live off champagne and mini Yorkshire puddings and slope about in free shoes.